This is the Biggest Mistake People Make When Creating an Online Dating Profile
Are you putting your best face forward in your online dating experience? Even though you’re sitting behind a computer screen, the person looking at your profile can see you.
I’m not talking about seeing you via a webcam. Your online profile is the equivalent of you sitting across the table with a first date in real time. The picture you paint of yourself in your online dating profile your first impression.
How is your first impression coming across? Are you setting yourself apart from the millions of other people involved in online dating? Are you painting a true to life picture of who you really are?
Why are people swiping on by instead of taking a minute to see who you really are? What makes a profile so great that people actually stop by? What turns them off?
You may be making one of the biggest mistakes many people make when creating their online dating profile. Here’s how to avoid that mistake when it comes to your online dating experience.
Don’t make the mistake of creating a generic online dating
Without a doubt, the mistake that so many people make (yikes!) is creating a generic, run of the mill profile. Browse through some profiles on popular dating sites and you’ll quickly see how outgoing, fun and adventurous everyone is!
Sure, those are some great adjectives, but those words lose their meaning when everyone is using them.
How many of us in the Catholic online dating world use and overuse the “holy, devout, and Christ centered” phrase? They’re wonderful descriptions, but they’re also generic enough to be read again and again across multiple profiles.
The problem with generic profiles is that they don’t spark interest. They don’t stop a person from browsing because they are curious about what they are reading.
So, what should online dating profiles look like?
Online dating profiles need to be authentic
Nothing sells a profile like authenticity. So you like to cook. Use your creativity to paint a fun picture of yourself in the kitchen. “My pancakes rival Aunt Jemima’s and don’t get me started on my cheese eggs!” sounds a lot more interesting than “I like to cook.”
When dating other Catholics, it’s tempting to think that all we need to do is let people know we are holy. If they’re on a Catholic dating website, there’s a good chance they’re prioritizing their faith and looking for someone who is doing the same. But that shouldn’t stop you from expanding your online dating profile and explaining what inspires you to strive for holiness.
Being authentic about who you are and why you are here is the most important thing to consider when building your online profile.
So, how do you go about doing so?
Start by telling your story
You don’t need to write an autobiography to complete your online dating profile. But you do need a good enough description that a person scrolling through profiles is going to stop and look at your profile.
Talk about something important to you. What are you passionate about? You don’t have to make yourself completely vulnerable, but do give them something they can connect with.
Share with others a story about yourself that gives them a good look at the things that are the most important to you. If those things are something they could see themselves becoming a part of, they will likely stop to say hello.
Many profiles, especially in the Catholic online dating community, can sound a little negative. People may not realize that saying over and over what they don’t want in a person can be a bit of a turn off. Focusing too much on the downside of dating can be a real turnoff to people browsing through online dating profiles.
Instead, focus on the wants and the good aspects of dating. Online dating can be fun, but it has to start with you. Have a positive and uplifting attitude when creating your profile and people will be attracted to it.
Be appreciative about the things you do have, and don’t dwell on the things you don’t.
There’s no need to convey your depression about the fact that you’ve been single for far too long. Rather, talk about how excited you are to meet Mr. or Mrs. Right because you know they are out there! Give the person browsing a reason to want to stop in and say hi.
It’s okay to put your best self forward
Putting your best foot forward doesn’t mean you should pretend to be someone you’re not.
But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t post a picture that highlights your personality. Talk about your interests and passions that help describe why you’re the kind of person someone may want to meet.
Don’t be afraid to boast about things that make you different or desirable. Just make sure those things are real!
Talk about your devotions and the way you spend your free time. Express your desire to do the things that bring you joy.
Want to change the world? Share the details of how and why. Bring them into the story of who you are and make them want to know that story better.
Never be afraid to highlight your attributes and explain what separates you from other people. Someone who knows what they’re good at and what would make them a great mate is much more desirable than the cookie cutter everyday profile.
Be true to who you are and let the world know it.
Cassi Villanueva is a freelance writer and contributing blogger at Catholic Singles. Born and raised in the south, when she's not writing, she can be found spending time with her husband and four children in the northern suburbs of Atlanta, GA.