Matchmaking the Old-Fashioned Way

My parents met on a blind date.

Just think. Aunt Phoebe wouldn’t exist—nor would you be reading this article– if somebody hadn’t thought to introduce a couple of friends to each other. My four siblings and I literally owe our existence to a blind date.

In fact, so do 17 grandchildren and 10 great-grandchildren 34 people and counting, a small village, from one blind date! History was made out of that one providential introduction. So, I’m into that sort of thing.

In fact, I sort of hate it that technology has taken over the matchmaking business. I think human beings are potentially much better at matchmaking.

Having said that, most of my successful matchmaking has been entirely unintentional. (It makes me wonder what I could do if I actually tried!)

Accidental Success Stories

There was that time I was taking swimming lessons with my friend Antonia. She wasn’t practicing her faith at the time. After class, she drove me to choir practice, and I invited her to come in.

We both arrived with wet hair—not exactly primped or coifed, if you get my drift. The choir director, Tom, was a talented musician and a bit of a geek. He liked big words. I said, “Tom, this is my friend Antonia.” They shook hands. The choir started singing the Hallelujah chorus. The next thing I knew they were dating. Suddenly, they were engaged.

Then there was that time that I was picking leaders for a college ministry. I wanted balance, male and female. There was Lora. She’d be good. Then there was Ken. He’d be good. In fact, I really liked the idea of them working together.

I had a certain sense that together, they’d do a good job. Sure enough, it turned out they worked really well together. Just like I thought they would. The next thing I knew, they were dating. Suddenly, they were engaged.

Then, there was that time when I was having a coffee on a certain university campus. A guy student I knew walked in, and joined me for coffee. Just as I was about to go, a girl student came over to the table to say hello to me.

Politely I introduced them, and then I left. She stayed. Years later, I found out they got married. And they credited me for their introduction. I had no idea! They didn’t even invite me to the wedding, I played such a minor role in either of their lives. I wasn’t even trying!! And I have literally changed the course of history.

And so, what can we learn from this?

It’s so Crazy, it Just Might Work!

Personally, I think the Indians are onto something–that whole “arranged marriage” model is actually pretty successful. I have a number of Indian friends whose marriages were arranged, and they actually defy Western expectations in terms of their compatibility and happiness.

Without actually quite crossing the line into arranged marriage, let’s connect some dots. We have started to let machines do it for us. But, let’s also draw a parallel: friends and family have the potential to become the best dating service in the world. What if we actually tried?

So, how about this? Everybody: get your phones out. Make a list of the Catholic single guys and Catholic single girls in your contact list. Dream up a project that you need a guy and a gal to lead it. Ask the Holy Spirit for guidance–what singles could you imagine working well together?

Now here’s an idea. Organize a project and ask them to lead it. Or, get with the guy and ask if he has a lady in his life. Tell him there’s someone you’d like to introduce him to—see if he’s open. If he’s open, check with her and see if she’s open. Invite them over for dinner at your place. Or, see if it’s okay with her if you give him your number, and let him take the initiative from there.

Here’s another idea. Same couple. Check the intersections. Youth ministry? Social outreach? Choir practice? Theatre? Theater? Political action? Tell her you want to introduce her to someone. Secretly. Bring her to the choir practice. Introduce her to him while the Hallelujah chorus is heard in the background. Check in with him (and her) later. “Sooooooooo………..what do you think of my friend?” Help. Them.

Seriously, we are so out of practice, it won’t even occur to anyone to resist.

Friends Don’t Let Friends Remain Single

Seriously folks, waaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy too many of us are single. This is not God’s will. God loves marriage too much to leave so many of us on our own.

Just think: you don’t have to conquer the world. You can become a partner with God, a shaper of history–just by introducing your friends to each other and encouraging them to give it some serious thought.

Friends don’t let friends drive drunk. And they don’t let them stay single either (unless they are Single For A Reason). Nor do they leave this dating business to machines. Get that phone out and call now.