This is my first column since giving birth to our third child! In anticipation of our baby’s arrival my heart was full of joy. I finished my last work assignment, the nursery was ready, the pantry was stocked, and I was ready to enjoy this miracle God had prepared for our family. Even our girls—who had just turned five and three, respectively—were giddy with excitement and not displaying any of the feared jealously common with the arrival of a new baby.
In the last few months of my pregnancy I attended daily Mass followed by a power walk. Leading up to the birth I felt mentally, physically, and most of all spiritually strong. Then the day finally arrived. After being admitted to the hospital and assigned a room, I took the time to say the Rosary. Upon completion of the “Hail Holy Queen,” the baby was ready to make a debut. Everything was going well when the doctor exclaimed, “It’s a boy!” Spontaneous tears trickled down my cheeks as I looked over at my husband who was beaming with love and offering God a prayer of thanks. We had a house of girls, and this was our first boy. My heart was full, and all our prayers were answered.
Within an hour following my son’s birth, I began experiencing very unanticipated complications. My vitals crashed, and I spent the next two days with faint delirious memories. By the third day I had finally stabilized but still had a long road ahead of me to gain strength. The joy of my son’s birth was shadowed by severe exhaustion from a challenging and difficult recovery.
The following days, weeks, and months with a new born and two small children were sprinkled with sleepless nights, a few priceless moments, and endless laundry. Most of all lots of crying, kids screaming, new school anxiety, and temper tantrums.
Through the most challenging times in my life, I always relied on prayer. In the last few months, I have fallen asleep during my Rosary and once during Mass. I have never felt so physically tired and mentally weary. I began to fear I was failing God in my prayer life. When I shared this thought with my Mother’s Sharing Ministry group’s leader, she hugged me and said, “Sweetie, this is your ministry right now. God blessed you to be a mother, and you’re not failing Him. Rely on Him for your strength.”
I’ve reflected on those words often. It was the gentle and loving reminder I needed to begin my day with a short prayer of thanks and asking Him to give me strength.
Today’s Gift for Your Soul – When you find yourself tired and weary open your Bible to Philippians 4:13, “I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.” Pray without ceasing. Be kind to yourself. Throughout your busy day continue to seek His presence and feel the joy of the Lord in your heart as He renews you.