Dating should be fun. Probably a big part of the reason why you have an active dating life is to add some recreation and communal enjoyment to your life. So getting bogged down in awkwardness is probably something you’d like to avoid.
Here’s another look at a set of awkward moments Catholics might face in their dating lives, and some more ideas on what to do about them.
When Your Date Has Too Much to Drink
One thing is for sure: You’re not the only one afraid of feeling awkward. You might start to realize this when you notice that your date is a few drinks ahead of you and starting to act a little tipsy.
Realizing that your date has gotten drunk, or is on the way there, can be awkward for anyone. You might start to wonder whether there is a problem with you, that they felt the need to drink so much. Rest assured that that’s probably not the case. Most likely, your date is just nervous. But that certainly doesn’t make it okay.
In the non-Catholic dating world, an occurrence like this wouldn’t necessarily be a big deal, and maybe you’d even consider joining them in inebriation. But a strong moral compass on your part adds another layer of issues to take into consideration.
How impaired has this person become? While there’s not necessarily anything wrong with a drink or two worth of relaxation and hilarity, becoming full-on drunk is actually a sin.
So while it’s not going to make things less awkward and will probably add a layer of cringe-worthiness, you should probably try to call them out on it. If possible, do it gently, non-accusatorily. But it’s not really something that you should overlook.
In fact, if you do think it’s possible that you could have a relationship with this person, you should probably consider diving into the issue and be making sure the person doesn’t have a drinking problem.
When You Catch Your Date in a Lie
A lot of people probably consider exaggerations about one’s accomplishments or talents to be pretty standard for a first date. But as Catholics, we know that honesty is something we should strive for in all aspects of our life.
So what if you catch your date saying something you know is not true?
The fact is that none of us are perfect, so if it’s along the lines of a minor exaggeration you might let it slide for now and just be on the lookout for whether it continues to be a problem.
But what if it’s something blatant and kind of huge? Personally, I would not consider this something that should be overlooked. It’s your decision whether or not to call them out on it, but you might want to think long and hard about continuing to date someone who doesn’t have as strong an appreciation for the truth as you do.
When Your Date is Too Comfortable Discussing Bodily Functions
Not everyone has the same ideas about what topics are fair game for open discussion, particularly when it comes to things like potty humor or bodily functions. And some things that you’d feel fine joking about with your brother are just not appropriate on a first date.
This is a true story that happened to a relative of mine when he was on a date with a girl he didn’t know very well. She went for a restroom break and was gone for several minutes. She came back and announced, “Oh, yeah. I feel five pounds lighter now.” He didn’t really know which way to look.
Honestly, there’s not much that can make such an awkward statement from a date feel normal. Perhaps the best course of action in a case like this would be to change the subject as quickly as possible and move on.
But from a Catholic perspective of charity, the one consideration to keep in mind is that this person might have been feeling awkward themselves, and they might even feel like crawling under a rock to die about now after letting something so awkward slip out.
So don’t give up immediately on the grounds of something like this alone. Nerves might have contributed a lot to a bizarre venture into awkward territory such as this.
When Someone Else Tries to Hit On Your Date
This can happen in a few different circumstances. Maybe you’re at a bar and a third party doesn’t realize that the two of you are together.
Or it can actually even happen in a specifically Catholic setting if the two of you are attending something together where a lot of singles tend to meet. I’m thinking specifically of events like Theology on Tap, which can sometimes tend to become a bit of a Catholic meet-market (sic).
So what do you do when someone awkwardly tries to steal your date? A polite but firm explanation is probably in order. Most intruders will probably apologize and scurry off to nurse their wounds of embarrassment.
Or occasionally, you might find someone more aggressive about it who doesn’t want to take a hint. That probably doesn’t happen too often outside of movies, but if it does, get security. Don’t get in a bar fight or anything. That would be even more awkward.
And of course, if something like this does happen, you might want to at least briefly examine whether the two of you give off a platonic, brother/sister vibe. Was there a reason the person missed that you and your date were together? Or were they just dense?
But at the end of the day, at least this one was someone else’s blunder. And if you and your date go on to start a relationship, this might be something that the two of you can laugh about for years to come.