Catholic Singles

Q & A - Oct 29th

by FrJim on Oct 29th, 2009 @ 07:56 PM

Dear Fr. Jim, My priest advised me not to attempt an annulment of my marriage until I meet someone. My divorce is now 2 yrs past. I understand annulments are a lengthy process and pretty difficult to achieve. My former spouse had mental health issues and I'm resolving the domestic abuse suffered in the 25 yr. marriage. I'm not in any relationship with a gentleman yet if I were to meet someone, I would not be able to date and frankly why would any man want to date anyone who is not free to marry. My faith is very important to me. I'm weekly in adoration chapel and find strength with parish friends. I'm learning daily how to turn it all over to God. I want to do what's right. Would you have any thoughts/recommendations? Thank you, R.

Dear R -
Thanks so much for your question.

I don't like to contradict a brother priest, but based on what you're sharing here, I don't understand why he would advise against getting an annulment. The fact that you're not in a relationship right now would seem to be a better time to go through the somewhat lengthy process. One of the goals from the process is to help the couple to learn what was missing from the marriage. I would think that one would benefit by having that awareness before they're dating or in a serious relationship with someone rather than waiting till you want to get married again.

My advice, try another priest or clarify with the first one why he advised waiting

Hope that's helpful!
God Bless,

Father Jim