Catholic Singles

REGRETS
BY: MARK ANTHONY ROSOLOWSKI


The other day I was walking past a playground, I saw several children on swings, going down slides and playing in a sandbox. I looked around and saw several women talking on benches as they watched the children play. On another bench set away from where the women were talking sat a woman all alone just sadly watching the children play.

I went over and asked if I could sit on the bench, the woman moved over and said, "Yes, I would enjoy the company." As I sat down she extended her hand and said, "Hello, my name is Nancy." I took her hand and introduced myself, and made a comment about how nice the day was. Nancy agreed that it was a nice day, and as she faced me I saw her red eyes and tear streaked face.

I looked at her and I guess she saw the questioning in my eyes and she turned her face and said, "I'm sorry I must look a mess, it is just that it has been a rough couple of days for me." I told her that there was no need to apologize; I then ventured to ask if she wanted to talk about what was upsetting her.

I watched as she wiped a tear from her eyes and she started, "I am just feeling a little down today, everyday I come to this park and I watch the children at play." "I see the little girls running around, jumping rope, playing hopscotch and holding their dolls." "I watch the boys wrestle, run around and play catch." "I watch the children run up to their parents, they hug and kiss them and then scamper off to play."

She took the tissue and dabbed at her eyes again. She let out a sigh and continued on, "I think about these children and their mothers, I imagine how their homes are." "I see the mothers helping them with homework, I see them playing games." "I look at them and I see the mothers getting their children ready for bed." "I see them praying together, the mother's putting them to bed and getting their good night hugs and kisses."

I was about to interrupt when she continued, "There are times that I wish I could do my life over." "I want to change some of the things I have done in my life, I want to reverse my mistakes." As she spoke those words she broke out in tears, she reached for my hand and held it. She sobbed, "Why do we have to make mistakes, why can't we know what will happen when we make a choice so we never regret it later."

I again started to speak but she spoke over me and said, "Six years ago when I was twenty-one, I was unmarried and pregnant, my friends convinced me to get an abortion." "They told me a baby would ruin my life, I would never be happy with a baby, that I was not ready to be a mother." She was crying more now as she said, "My baby would be about the same age as those children are, I would be playing with my child if I did not get an abortion."

Through tears she continued, "Now that I am married I want to have a family, and the other day I found out that I can never get pregnant." I reached out and held her in my arms as she cried. As I held her she said, "Why don't they tell you about all that you will miss out on when you have an abortion, why don't they tell you about the love you will never experience." I held her until she was cried out; she thanked me for listening and said, "I have to get home."

As she walked away I turned my attention to the children, I said a silent prayer, thanking God for my children and asked God to forgive Nancy and to please reunite her with her child in Heaven one day.