Catholic Singles

Hey Father Jim, I want to know if its OK to totally go out of your way to try and get a girls attention and act like meeting her was just a coincidence . I like this girl who goes to this church, and if I were to go out of my way to try and get her number and talk to her is this wrong? I don't want this girl to know I'm going out of my way because she might think I'm weird. I just don't know any other way to start talking to her. Please Help me Father.

- Well this is a new one for me!  A psuedo morality question/relationship question.  I guess the first question is about whether it's "dishonest" to plan a meeting (pretending it's a coincidence).  In the grand scheme of things, is it a "lie" - well, I suppose that depends on how technical you're getting. 

But here's my point, you don't want to spend that much time obsessing about planning a way to meet someone and trying to determine if you're being dishonest or not.  I understand you're not wanting to come across as "creepy" or "weird" - but couldn't you just open with some pleasant conversation and maybe drop in "I'm a bit shy, so I was a bit nervous, but I was really was hoping to meet you ..."

While guys often work overtime to appear "confident" - most women can appreciate when a guy expresses their own vulnerabilities, and then is able to overcome them (saying I'm shy, but going out of my comfort zone, taking a chance and trying to meet someone).

"Honesty is the best policy" - cliche I know, but usually there's a reason those cliche's exsist

Good Luck and keep me posted on how that works for you!

Fr Jim