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by FrJim on Dec 3rd, 2009 @ 08:13 PM

Dear Father Jim - I am a returning member to Catholicsingles.com. I joined several years ago but left after an extended period because I did not have much success. Even though I sent "invitations" to women I thought would be compatible, most of them did not have the courtesy to send back a response.

Any suggestions so I might be more successful this time?   Sincerely Looking

Dear "Sincerely Looking"

 

You're not the first person I've received an email like this from, so I hope I can be of some help or encouragement...I'm sorry its been a bit difficult trying to make a connection on here.  As great as Catholic singles can be, there's always going to be some difficulty in meeting someone and sharing who you are so that they can get to know what a great person you are. 

A couple of suggestions that come to mind though would be to

1 - jump in the chat rooms.  People seem to have some fun conversations in there and develop some good friendships there.  It might help "break the ice" for you - even suggesting in sending a message or invitation to someone to chat with you in there.  It also takes the pressure off of you by having other people in the "room" "chatting"

 

2 - be honest and upfront.  People never want to be misled or lied to.  If something that you have on a profile is less than acurate, it really can derail things right from the start.

 

3 - share somethings that distinguish you.  People appreciate some stories, shared experiences.  There's many ways people start to get to know and relate to each other.  Finding common things, whether it's you hail from the same state or you're both Italian are great openings for relationships.

 

4 - Finally, don't lose Hope!  And recognize the true source of all LOVE!  - 1 John 4: 7-12: Beloved, let us love one another, because love is of God; everyone who loves is begotten by God and knows God.
 
Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love.
 
In this way the love of God was revealed to us: God sent his only Son into the world so that we might have life through him.
 
In this is love: not that we have loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as expiation for our sins.
 
Beloved, if God so loved us, we also must love one another.

No one has ever seen God. Yet, if we love one another, God remains in us, and his love is brought to perfection in us.

Hope thats of help and God's Blessings!

Father Jim





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